Dong Qing: a happy family never coincides with the three values, but does not fight for right or wrong (good article)

Dong Qing said: home is each of our initial memories, but also our ultimate destination.

We have been pursuing a happy family all our lives, demanding that our values agree with each other.

but I don't know that what really determines whether a family is happy or not is not the same values, but whether it is right or wrong.

01

the Book of Rites once said: "the old-age age of a filial son does not go against his will." "

filial piety to parents, the most important thing is to make them feel happy and worry-free.

if some trifles are quarrelled because of different ideas, the loss will outweigh the gain.

my father is a man of extreme economy. He often sneaks into the room to turn off the TV, although he has repeatedly explained that turning it off does more harm to the TV and does not save electricity at all.

but my father does it as usual every time. He has faith-like respect for economy since the poor years.

save the unfinished meal for tomorrow, even if overnight food is not good for people's health;

clothes are torn, sewing and mending can still be worn, even if a lot of new clothes are bought for him in the wardrobe;

when cooking, the habit is heavier, because in this way you can eat more steamed bread and save some dishes, even though there are many kinds of dishes now, it is also very cheap.

in theory, my father's thinking has belonged to the old stubbornness, and it seems out of place and even full of mistakes in the current era of advocating less salt and more vegetables.

but my father enjoyed it and thought in his heart that he could save a lot for his children, though it was rare.

is he wrong? Maybe it's wrong, but isn't it the most important thing to be happy?

in life, many people never get tired of telling the truth to their old parents who abide by the old rules, but they do not realize that some of their behaviors have become habits.

if you fight for right or wrong with them, it will not only chill their hearts, but also make them submissive and estranged from each other.

it is the stupidest act in the world to fight with your parents for right or wrong. According to their wishes, the harvest of happiness is the most important.

02

people often ask: "what is a happy marriage like?"

someone replied, "it's just you making a scene and he's laughing."

in marriage, the harmony of the three values is important, but the most important point is often overlooked, that is, there is no dispute between right and wrong.

there is such a story:

husband and wife opened a flower shop. When the new store opened, the husband posted publicity activities on moments to collect praise and get things for free, but forgot to indicate the quantity. As a result, there is a steady stream of people coming to collect things.

this mistake led to heavy losses in the newly opened shop. It was inappropriate not to send it away, so it made a loss to itself. I can only explain the situation to every customer who arrives, hoping that the other side will understand.

but people still come to pick up things one after another, and the wife scolds her husband angrily, saying firmly that he has done something wrong, otherwise there would not be so much trouble.

the husband feels aggrieved and wants to do his part, and it is inevitable to be negligent in the face of the opening of the new store.

while the wife is still relentless, quarrelling with each other, which eventually leads to the closure of the small shop which has not been open for long.

what's the point of arguing that the other party is wrong? In the face of what happens, it is the best way to choose a timely remedy.

actress Liu Tao has always been called "the good wife of the Republic of China". When Wang Ke went bankrupt, she chose to stay around and even took on a huge debt.

her love with Wang Ke was also praised by everyone. She once shared her way of getting along with husband and wife, but there were eight simple words: "Don't fight for right or wrong, don't say much."

she said:

sometimes arguments are inconclusive, but the process of arguing can make people feel tired and uncomfortable.

Family is common, love is common, and we have everything in common.

the journey of my life is for two people to walk slowly together. I don't have to worry about it. I think any hassle is hurt.

Yes, any hassle is an injury.

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couples will inevitably encounter disagreements with each other. If you argue blindly about right or wrong, you will only lose both sides and even destroy your own family.

03

in life, many people will immediately argue that their ideas are right, and then spend time and painstaking efforts in the process.

although the final result won, it was not happy.

as the world often says, "Honey, if you are too competitive, you will never be happy!"

in Zhu Zi's Family motto, it is mentioned that if you stay at home and abstain from litigation, litigation is the ultimate culprit.

living at home, it is forbidden to argue with each other, because no matter whether the outcome of the argument is right or wrong, it is not good in the end.

Home is not a place to distinguish between right and wrong. Home is not about right or wrong, but about one word and word.

A happy family has long been unreasonable and only talks about love.

A person who knows how to harvest happiness has already learned to quit the family "battlefield".

not fighting for right or wrong is a kind of wisdom that looks foolish, a kind of love that moistens all things silently, and a necessary condition for a happy family!