My mother-in-law undressed in front of my husband and me: "what's all the fuss about?"

on August 16th, 2009, I got married naked in Beijing.

my husband is a cameraman in the company, and we worked together for three years. I often lead a team to shoot. When I came back from a May Day business trip in 2008, I saw him waiting for me downstairs, holding a small gift for me: a Disney necklace. After that, we naturally became boyfriend and girlfriend under the matchmaking of our colleagues. My tutoring is more traditional, so the two people don't live together. In addition, each of us was very busy at that time, and it was the only long-distance trip for us to go back to my hometown Hubei to meet our parents on National Day.

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before that, he had just finished his long-distance relationship with his ex-girlfriend in Tianjin. He said the girl was good at everything, but he didn't respect his parents. His request to his girlfriend is very simple: just be nice to his parents. I think this is also human nature, so every month, we will go back to Tianjin to visit them.

I have the impression that his mother is a beautiful and shrewd aunt. Every time we go home, she warmly prepares a table of food. His father went out for years when he was young, his mother propped up the family alone, and the mother and son grew up dependent on each other. Later, without any success, my father returned to Tianjin and found a job with the help of his mother. At the monthly meeting, everyone was polite, talking and laughing.

in the second year of love, at the urging of our parents, we went to the Civil Affairs Bureau to get a marriage license. The husband didn't want his parents to worry about it, so he didn't hold a wedding or buy a house, even though the house price in Beijing was not that high at that time. I thought filial piety and thoughtfulness were a good thing, so I simply agreed. As a senior bank accountant's mother-in-law said: " I know the property market, now prices have reached a high, do not buy, wait until the fall." "

We rented a house outside the Fifth Ring Road and started our newlywed life together. Life was busy and simple, and we were happy.

the husband said that Beijing drifters worked too hard and had to go back to settle down in Tianjin sooner or later. So I decided to go to Tianjin to find a job. Having studied journalism and worked in the media in Beijing, I thought that to be a wife and a mother, the family was the most important. I could no longer run around the world with my film crew as I did in the past. So I switched to the IT service industry and learned everything from scratch.

in December of the year, I got married, and I returned to Tianjin alone. At the same time when my husband and I separated, I began to live in a real sense of mother-in-law and daughter-in-law.

two

my mother-in-law's house is 60 square meters with two bedrooms and one living room. To be nice to my mother-in-law, I would give her 2000 yuan every month for rent and living expenses, even though my salary was only 3000 at that time.

at that time, grandma was still there, her parents-in-law slept in one room, and grandma slept in one room. When I got there, grandma and I shared a bedroom, two old wooden boxes, and a few wooden boards, which was my little bed.

when I first got married, grandma took me to the jewelry store and asked me to pick out jewelry, but I didn't want her to spend more money, so I finally chose the lightest little ring. She told me that my father-in-law had a bad temper and was incompetent. Had it not been for the contempt for divorce in that era, she would have asked her daughter to divorce her son-in-law. Grandma often said, holding my hand and saying, "you should be more considerate to your mother and be nice to your mother, ah."

when I lived in my mother-in-law's house, I began to feel that there was a distance between this family and the appearance I saw before I got married.

my husband and I used to come back every month and ate meticulous meals prepared by my parents-in-law. after we moved in, it was common for four people to eat with two or three dishes on the table. Each dish is very salty so you can eat a bowl of rice with very few dishes. My mother-in-law said, "I'm used to saving during the famine, and I can't change it." It's just that every weekend when her husband comes back, she will thaw the big fish and meat in the refrigerator ahead of time and fill more than half of the table.

my father-in-law is no longer as talkative as he was before marriage, and he is seldom joking. He always plays games on an old computer or lies on the sofa in the living room watching TV until he falls asleep. My father-in-law sleeps on the sofa every day, and there is always only my mother-in-law on the bed in the master bedroom.

in this family, the mother-in-law earns a lot of money, the house belongs to the mother-in-law, and the grandmother is also the mother-in-law. although my father-in-law has the worst temper at home, he is also the least important. He can't make up his mind about anything big or small. He was happy to be at leisure, doing nothing but cooking.

although her mother-in-law is in power, she works hard, sweeping the floor, washing clothes, decorating the house, and no one will share it with her, and her father-in-law will not chat with her, let alone make her happy. So at first, I felt sorry for this mother-in-law.

my husband still works in Beijing and goes back to Tianjin after work every Friday. Every time the husband comes home, there are a lot of tasks. Either drive her mother to run errands or accompany her to visit relatives and friends. After the busy day, my mother-in-law arranged for my husband to sleep on the sofa at night, but I still lived in a cabin with my grandmother, which made me somewhat depressed. After all, we just got married.

my husband, afraid of my boredom, would take me to my neighbor's house to play cards at night and didn't come home until late at night. The thing I look forward to most every weekend is playing cards with him at the neighbor's house. Although it is not a two-person world, at least it is not under the noses of my parents-in-law.

  three  

the husband is bathing in the bathroom, and her mother-in-law will go straight to the bathroom door and ask him to open the door. He said, "Mom, I'll give you what you want." She disagreed and shouted outside the door, " you open the door and let me in. It's no one else." "I put down my newspaper and watched blankly at the end of the living room.

We sat in the bedroom chatting, and my mother-in-law wanted to change clothes, so she went directly. Take off all the coats one by one in front of us, and then calmly change into pajamas. Seeing that I had the wrong expression, she said, "what's all the fuss about?"

after living in this family for several months, I gradually found that their mother-son relationship is too close. I can only comfort myself: after all, my mother was brought up alone, and mother and son have a good relationship, understanding, understanding.

February 14, 2010, the first day of the Lunar New year, is also Valentine's Day. There were too many relatives to stay with, so my husband and I had to sleep at his friend's house. It was the first time we had the opportunity to live alone since we came to Tianjin, and it was on that night that I was pregnant with a child.

unexpectedly, from this moment on, the relationship between me and my mother-in-law became more and more strained.

my husband is more considerate to me because he is pregnant. He often comes back on Friday and goes back to work in Beijing on Monday morning. At home, we occasionally cuddle and make out. My mother-in-law was not happy and talked to me privately: "Don't be too bored at home. Grandma is too old-fashioned to get used to it." He also asked me to urge my husband to return to Beijing on Sunday, saying that it was easy to be late for work on Monday.

soon after I became pregnant, I had some signs of threatened miscarriage, and there was no problem with going to the hospital for an examination, but my mother-in-law seized this opportunity to persuade me to get rid of the baby, saying that the baby would be unhealthy if I was not satisfied with soil and water. They also said that they had not yet retired and that the baby was not taken care of, so they did not want to be tired.

my mother-in-law mobilized almost all the relatives in my mother-in-law to persuade me to have an abortion and even went so far as to find two relatives with a doctor background to tell me why the child was not fit to stay. After a series of ineffective persuasion, my husband joined me in persuading me to have an abortion.

"my mother has a point. Every time I come back recently, my parents are unhappy because you insist on having this child." Hearing this coming out of my husband's mouth, I felt a chill all over.

at that moment I secretly decided that I would keep the baby no matter what, even if I divorced after giving birth.

my mother-in-law gave me an ultimatum: you have to get rid of the baby, you have to give birth, you have to take it with you, and the class goes on. My son can't afford to support you two.

she stared at me and said, "as a woman, you have to pay more for your family."

I was six months pregnant. Because I was so depressed at home, I moved out because I was too far away from work and rented a house outside. Every day a person commutes to and from work with a stomach, buys food, and cooks. The children are unpopular, and my husband comes back every week to catch up with me for the antenatal examination. This kind of life lasted for three months until the hospital gave birth.

before giving birth, my mother-in-law felt that she would be tired and worried all day long, saying what to do if there was no one to take care of the baby. After the baby was born, I finished it by myself.

four

the separation between the two places diluted our relationship. After the baby was born, I asked to take the baby back to Beijing and live with the three of us. My husband agreed to let me take care of the children full-time, but my mother-in-law objected to my not going to work. I applied to the company for a transfer to Beijing again, but she still didn't agree. She advised us: "strong> how nice it is for you to get together on weekends, just like vacations.

I think my mother-in-law is so opposed to my going to Beijing, probably because after going back, my husband and wife will only go back to Tianjin once a month, so she can't see her son very often.

my mother-in-law did not want me to go to Beijing, and I insisted on not living apart. When the child was half a year old, my husband finally decided to resign and return to Tianjin.

that night, my mother-in-law scolded me for hours when she heard the news of her husband's resignation. No matter how I explained it, she always insisted: "if you didn't work well, could he resign?" Such a good job, thousands of yuan a month, but also give insurance. " That night, I contradicted her for the first time.

her strength is only shown in front of me. In front of her son, she is always soft and weak. Whenever she wants to make a request, she will lie on the bed and say that her blood pressure is dizzy and high. She stood in the kitchen wiping away her tears and said, "I don't know what to do."

maybe she projected her expectations of her husband on her son, so that he unconsciously took the place of his father, assumed the responsibility of taking care of his mother, and could not refuse any request from his mother.

when my husband came back from Beijing in the middle of the night, I was breastfeeding the baby in the house. My mother-in-law took her husband to the kitchen and wiped away tears. One of them I still remember: "your wife said that she is looking for a good job in Beijing and earns more than in Tianjin." It's your sudden resignation that wasted her opportunities to earn more jobs in Beijing. " I was shocked for a long time when I heard what she made up through the glass door.

in the evening, I explained to my husband that he didn't care what I said or why I said it. Anyway, it's my fault to contradict.

after her husband returned to Tianjin, he didn't want to go to work, so he only went out to shoot the wedding ceremony on weekends. I go to work normally from nine to five. I come back every day to buy food and cook and coax the children. When he is free, he plays games day and night at home.

my daily expenses depend on my salary. When I complained that he did not support his family, he said slowly that he just wanted to live an easy life, and maybe he was not fit to get married or be a father.

"my parents used to be like this. When my father didn't do anything, I envied him."

I thought of divorce, but the traditional parents firmly opposed it: "if you have children, you can't leave for the sake of your children." I can only comfort myself that maybe one day he will grow up.

after giving birth, the mother-in-law's intervention, large and small, never stopped. Stop. Everything from where to buy a house, what to buy, to what brand of water heater to use when decorating.

in 2012, I accidentally became pregnant with my second child. It is conceivable that my parents-in-law did not even want me to have their first child, so how could they possibly agree that I should have a second child? But after hearing the news, the husband was very happy. He said that when he was an only child, he was very lonely, so it was good for Dabao to have a companion.

I said, "if you want to have this child, you must be able to withstand the pressure of your parents." The husband was silent again.

 at that time, I made a decision not to protect the baby, not to ask for leave, and to ride my bike to Dabao kindergarten, as usual, every day. I thought to myself: if this child miscarries, it is providence.

when I was 9 weeks pregnant, I went to the hospital for an examination, and the B-ultrasound doctor told me that the baby was very healthy and lively. I cried at that moment, no matter how hard it is in the future, just keep him.

my mother-in-law knew I was pregnant again, so she came home early in the morning and said to me, "you can't afford to raise two children." I won't excuse her, but let her talk to her husband.

maybe I grew up as a father, but this time my husband didn't listen to them and sided with my children and me. After that, he also went out to look for more job opportunities, and I had a little hope for the rest of my life.

after her mother-in-law retired, she got a job as an accountant in a financial company. She went around to persuade people to buy wealth management products in her company and let us put our savings there. I thought it was risky and didn't agree.

after a while, my mother-in-law suddenly told her husband that grandma had moved to her eldest daughter's house and that she was going to resign and go home to help us take care of the children. My husband and I were so grateful that we took the children and went back to our mother-in-law's house.

it wasn't her resignation, but the financial company ran away with the money. she saved her whole life, throwing in 400000 yuan that her son could not even give up when she got married. At the same time, she also took hundreds of thousands of dollars from relatives and friends around her and invested it in her name.

at that time, she often said that she was going out to run errands, but she was reporting the case without telling the whole family. But my mother-in-law's behavior of eating interest spreads may constitute an accessory. The police did not file a case for her, but also her good. As for the money she had been cheated out of, of course, she couldn't get it back.

for a long time, relatives and friends who have been deceived by their mother-in-law have come to ask for money. We don't know what our mother-in-law owes, but it will certainly not be lower than the hundreds of thousands we have seen. With our income, if we want to repay the money, we have to sell the house.

my mother-in-law refuses to sell the house she lives in, and she knows that it doesn't make sense for us to sell the house directly to her to pay her debts. Grandma also has an old house, although old and small, but the school district room.

my mother-in-law had a countermeasure. She asked her husband to sell our big house in the suburbs to buy Grandma's small one. This small one will sell as much as our house costs. She thought that when all the money was in her grandmother's account, she would get it from her grandmother so that the usury she owed to her relatives and friends could be disposed of unnoticed.

it's just that our family lost the big house we just bought. At first, I refused to sell the house, but my mother-in-law found time to lie in bed and cry, saying that she was ill and had a headache. When we hurry to sell the house, she can feel at ease. My husband could not see my mother-in-law like this and urged me to sell the house quickly.

one night, at 11:30, my mother-in-law called my husband and me to her house and asked us to agree to sell the house. I said, "I don't agree." The mother-in-law turned around and asked her son, "what's your opinion?" The husband thought for a moment and said, "I want to buy Grandma's house."

"I have to sell the house, but I'm going to take half the money." My husband is like this, so I have to give in.

half of the money in the house is not enough. She asked her husband to use the excuse of "buying expensive mahogany furniture" to go to the bank for a loan of 800000 yuan and buy grandma's house together with half of the money.

I advised my husband not to do such a thing, but my husband told me that my mother-in-law had found the relationship with the bank and all kinds of materials were ready, as long as I went to the bank with him to sign.

as a wife, I must sign his loan contract as a co-lender. However, I know it is suspected of breaking the law. Defrauding loans of more than 500000 belong to a particularly large amount, and there is a risk of going to prison. If something happens and we both go to jail, what will happen to the children?

husband said: "my mother retired from the bank, she is sure."

"Have you forgotten how your mother was cheated into usury?"

he was silent for a moment and uttered only five words: "I believe my mother."

"then let's get divorced, so you don't need my signature." I don't want to entrust myself and my children's life to such a man anymore.

"good." He hardly hesitated.

on July 25, 2016, we completed the divorce formalities and ended our seven-year relationship.

the afternoon I walked out of the Civil Affairs Bureau, I looked at him at the door and said, "if you marry again, remember to leave your parents."

his reply was unforgettable to me for the rest of my life: "I will never marry again, so I will live with my mother for the rest of my life."