Weibo suicide

every morning I bet myself that my boyfriend will reply to my Weibo. Before my eyes opened, the expectation began to wake up, more and more burning, I was so swollen that I could no longer lie down, so I jumped to my feet and jumped to the side of the computer. & nbsp; & nbsp;

but each Weibo page is like a pool of stagnant water, motionless. No yellow label pops up and tells me, "you have x unread messages, please click here to check." & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

I checked the network, unplugged the cable, plugged it in, refreshed the page, and remained motionless. I went to brush my teeth and wash my face, I went to breakfast, took the subway to work, and staggered in the crowd with my cell phone. The front page was still motionless. The day passed, no yellow label popped up, and told me, "you have x unread messages. Please click here to check." This is problematic and wrong. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

& nbsp; because I know my boyfriend loves me very much. After we broke up, we stopped following each other's ID, but he would open my tiny page again and again and read what I posted that day. He was silent, but for the sake of face. He always makes a noise. For example, last winter, when I had a fever and hung water, I photographed the needle on my hand and posted it on it. In the evening, I received some responses one after another. For some colleagues and college classmates, the penultimate item was his. He said, "are you feeling better?" Only then did I know that he was looking at my Weibo, and he was in a trap. & nbsp; & nbsp;

I send one or two Weibo messages every day. I post selfies, cook delicious food and admire the beautiful weather. Sometimes, when I eat with my roommate, I suddenly stay still: this dish looks good, and my haircut is cute today. take a picture of me. My roommate put down his chopsticks and spoon and took out his cell phone to take a picture of me. I also think my side face is better, you go to the left side of the table to pat me, the left oblique upper corner, almost 45 °. Wait a minute, I'll eat first, and you shoot when I don't expect it. It's more natural. Roommates always say, "Oh yes, is that all right?" & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

& nbsp;  I feel bad, so I will ask my roommate to take another picture for me. The roommate frowned at most, but this little embarrassment is nothing compared to a satisfactory picture, right? & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

& nbsp; I picked out the best one and sent it to my sister who is good at PS on QQ. Sister, it's time for you to show. Give me a hand. What, P? P just has to look good, the face is smaller, the eyes are bigger, the tone is softer, and make it lomo style. & nbsp; & nbsp;

"Oh yes." & nbsp; & nbsp;

A few hours later, my sister sent me the picture on QQ, with a moan of dying when the job was done. But I was not satisfied, so I continued to propose amendments impolitely. "the face is not small enough and the eyeballs are not natural enough. Can you make more black spots? Can this dress become the prettiest one I bought on my birthday? " & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp;  "God, I can only fix pictures, not magic." My sister went offline as soon as she said that. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; but what does it matter? a little bit of trouble and a little bit of uncomfortable is nothing compared to being able to post a perfect picture on Weibo. I have saved dozens of such photos for later use. I put them in a special folder, one or two a day, and send them slowly. I usually casually type in "I didn't put on much makeup today, I didn't sleep well last night, and the dark circles under my eyes are so heavy, so annoying." anyway, I pick out an invincible photo from the folder and post it, and spend the rest of my time sitting and receiving comments. I know that my boyfriend will see it, and he will be surprised to find that I am more gorgeous than before. He must have blurted out, "whine!" & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp;  but for the sake of face, he never said a word. & nbsp; & nbsp;

I asked my roommate how one could save face so much. My roommate shrunk his mouth and shrugged his shoulders in an American TV series, which probably means, I don't know. & nbsp; & nbsp;

my sister, who is familiar with all kinds of motivational Chicken Soup, recited aloud, "before I met you, I didn't know my cowardice." Before I met you, I didn't know my flinching. Before I met you. Everything was turned upside down at the moment I met you. From then on, I was a coward, but because I met you, I fell in love with you. Aah! " I smashed my pillow before she finished. "Sister, goosebumps are all over the floor!" & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; but I am overjoyed. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

my boyfriend is just more reserved. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; his most recent Weibo post read: TNND Meiyu, wet, irritable. No one knows better than me that he is expressing himself more implicitly. He endures the cold war and yearns with great patience. Tired. But he wants to say that he is upset because of Meiyu. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

he always makes a noise, but I don't know when. & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp; one day, I leaned against the door and asked my roommate, "have we known each other for a long time?" The roommate raised his face covered with a white mask. "what do you want to do for you again? if it's a picture, wait a minute." I was a little embarrassed and smiled. "instead of taking pictures, I'll get a bonus next month and treat you to a big dinner." "Wow!" The roommate is very happy. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

I held out a finger to help her squeeze the bubble out of her mask. "so it's okay for you to post it for me now?"

"cut" the roommate pulled out a tissue and wiped his hand. "come on, what's going on?" & nbsp; & nbsp;

that night, my roommate @ me on Weibo, "who is the man who sent you flowers today?" Attached is a picture that I carefully selected from the folder and passed on to her, in which I smiled like a flower. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

the Weibo message was forwarded 30 times in less than 10 minutes, and my colleagues, my college classmates, and all the bloggers I didn't know started gossiping, "what's going on?" "Is someone chasing you?" "check to see if her star sign has had any luck recently." "something's wrong!" & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

among these people, some people are followed by my boyfriend. When they forwarded it, the Weibo message would appear on his home page. I counted it and it would appear three times. Be anxious, boy, I have a lot of people chasing, boiling, freshly-baked anxiety! I almost jumped. & nbsp; & nbsp; but when I woke up the next day, new distress appeared. & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& the N sentences "No picture, no truth!" appeared in nbsp; Weibo comments. They seem to be programmed "manipulators" and "time machines" that automatically copy and paste, with one voice, everywhere. My colleagues and classmates are crazy, not only are they, but more unknown IDs are also involved, those different shapes of square avatars, like a blind mouth, the shape of the consistent shouting to see the flowers I received photos as if it had something to do with them. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; I can't help it. I'll buy flowers after work. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

because I know that although my boyfriend is not talking, he must be comforting himself: no picture, no truth, so don't worry, um, don't worry. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

after buying flowers, I called my sister. Dear sister, our relationship has always been so good, so good. When you were in primary school, you started to write your summer homework the day before school. If you can't finish it, I won't help you with Rest all night. I've got frostbite on my hands. When your parents saw the love letter you received when you were in junior high school, you were so embarrassed that you wanted to bump your head to death. I stepped forward and said, "these are all mine!" Mine! " Regardless of the serious bug such as the beginning of the love letter in this lie. When you were in high school. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

& nbsp; half an hour later, my sister's skinny body was carrying a heavy SLR camera, squatting and squatting in the cold wind, and took hundreds of pictures of me holding flowers in an hour, looking at the front and side of the lens, walking without looking at the lens, standing still and moving, everything. & nbsp; & nbsp;

flipping through the photos in the camera, my eyes are dim with tears, sister, you are so kind to me, you can rest assured that your contribution will not be forgotten when my sister is happy. My sister sighed: as long as you are happy. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; is a touching day, the air is full of everyone's happiness, birds and animals run to tell each other: he is going to make a sound, he is going to make a sound! & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

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unexpectedly, "I guess the beginning, but I can't guess the end." & nbsp; & nbsp;

while I spent two and a half hours picking out a photo and sending it to my sister, waiting for my sister to PS, I cheaply browsed my boyfriend's Weibo several times. I think, boy, it's going to be fun soon. Wait a few more minutes and you'll cry! About the tenth time I refreshed, a new piece of content popped up on the boyfriend page. He said, "I'm so full! The picture attached is a large table of dishes. My heart sank and my ears began to ring. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

I have this reaction not because he sent a "hee hee" of sissy, but because he said @ an ID, after this sentence. Anyway, it looks like a woman. & nbsp;

& nbsp; I took a steady breath, lost my breath, and took three deep breaths before I went to order the fruit. This process is simply the last hurdle of the TV entertainment program Zhi Yong, which is full of wind, knives, rain and arrows all the way, waiting for me to accept that I am a woman and have posted a lot of intimate photos with my boyfriend. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

my sister shook me on QQ. "I'm almost done. How am I going to post Weibo later, just say secretly take pictures of you?" "No." I was surprisingly calm and didn't cry. After sitting for a while, I didn't know what to do, so I squeezed out a few tears. I felt cold again and wiped it off.. & nbsp; 

& nbsp;  I haven't posted another Weibo in a week. & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp; Weibo regained its calm and turned back into a pool of stagnant water, motionless all day. No yellow label pops up and tells me, "you have x unread messages, please click here to check." & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; when I go to work and work, I seldom talk. The surface is calm, but my heart is calm. My roommate looked at me worriedly and said, you have to get out as soon as possible. I mean, I used to be stupid, right? The roommate said it's okay. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

my sister brought me fruit, yogurt, nuts, and a few bottles of Watson's vitamins on sale. She threw them on the bed and went next door to whisper to my roommate. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

I'm really fine. I said to them. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

later, to prove that I was fine, I started posting Weibo, still posting selfies, posting good food, and admiring the good weather. But I don't expect my ex-boyfriend to say anything anymore. & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp; things change on a boring evening. It rained a little that day and the air were chilly. I wandered into the nearby family convenience store after work, picked out a few strings of Guandong cooking, and stood in line at the counter to check out when a pair of male and female middle school students walked past, and the girl touched my elbow. The soup from the Kanto cooking paper cup spilled out and wet my cuffs. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

it is not very hot and the wet range is not wide. I am not very angry. Besides, when people apologize, again and again, I shake my hand and say, "Oh, it's all right, ha." But I walked out of the family and into the cool rain. I felt very cold. I pulled up my collar and pulled my sleeves forward. I found my left wrist very uncomfortable. The cool curry soup was sticky and greasy, printed through the clothes, and wet on the skin, which was covered with a thin, yellowish solid like candle oil. I felt the tissue from my bag and felt the "heart to heart" bag. As soon as I pinched it, it was empty. I began to get upset. I took out my phone and sent a Weibo saying, "I want to die!" & nbsp; on my way home, I ate Guantong boil and bought a copy of "Shanghai one week". I staggered in the subway. Maybe there were not many people, there were many seats, maybe I saw a handful of handsome guys. Anyway, I hummed and was not in a bad mood. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

when I got home, I took off my shoes, rubbed my feet, turned on my computer, posted on Weibo, and then something went wrong. & nbsp; & nbsp;

my ex-boyfriend commented on my Weibo. He said, "what's wrong?" & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; I rubbed my eyes hard and clicked on this ID, again and again, to check his old Weibo. I didn't know for sure it was him until five pages later. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

how to reply, do you want to reply and forward it? I want to scratch my head and stamp my feet. Calm down, I told myself. I've been waiting for this moment for such a long time. I must be calm and put on a static brake. Think of the most thoughtful and most regret-free reply. I take a bath, knead out a lot of bubbles, and spend it slowly. I got my fingers white and swollen. I got up to watch TV and ate the fruits and walnuts my sister bought for me. I moved around, but I couldn't touch the computer, and my cell phone was off. My boyfriend commented on my Weibo, but I ignored him. I enjoy this state, as long as it is extended. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

late at night, when I turned on my computer, do you know what happened? my Weibo message was forwarded crazy. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; yellow tag pops up, "you have 155 unread messages, please click here to see." When you click on it, new ones pop up, and the number in the label is constantly increasing, refreshing history again and again. I started ringing in my ears again, and by the time I figured out the situation, I had more than 300 comments. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

turns out to be my relatives and friends. Because what happened last time was widely told by my sister, they all thought that I was in the pain of being lovelorn. Today, I couldn't get over it and wanted to die. & nbsp; 

& more and more people come to nbsp;  to persuade them. & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

"Honey, don't forget it!" & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

"it's normal to be depressed, don't beat yourself up." & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

& nbsp; "good years, don't ruin yourself because of a man." There was also someone who knew about it and grabbed my boyfriend's ID. "this is the man who has made such a nice girl crazy for so long!" (divine nervous Sutra? ) & nbsp; & nbsp;

"Don't you comfort other girls!" & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

"cheating Emperor." & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp;  and my sister, unexpectedly, sent me 20 private messages in a row, asking questions impatiently. "what do you think about all the time?" She said. & nbsP;

several female colleagues are also very anxious. They @ my roommate, "go and see her, please." The cell phone is also turned off. " But my roommate is in the hotel with her boyfriend. "I'll find a way to get in touch." My roommate said, "Don't worry." & nbsp; & nbsp;

it turns out that I am a suicidal person. I went to see the Weibo I posted this afternoon, which looked like a lovelorn suicidal person. I think, it feels good, ah, so many people follow me, you see a lot of people who add V, that is my sister's idol, and this, who starred in "Invincible Youth", they all retweeted my Weibo and became my fans. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

I hummed. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

but after a while, I began to get restless because people kept asking, "how is it now?" "who knows where she is now?" "give her address by human flesh!" & nbsp; & nbsp; I remember, I didn't want to kill myself. I want to answer them, you think too much, I never want to kill myself, I have nothing to do. But I deleted it as soon as I finished typing. It's all right. Why do you post such a Weibo? why do you "really want to die" and add an exclamation point? Are you kidding me? & nbsp; & nbsp; I think there is something wrong. I am in a bad mood and unhappy in the afternoon. However, why not? I only remember that curry oil stuck to my hands was uncomfortable, very uncomfortable. But I can't reply to people like this. I can't tell them that in the afternoon, I just have an upset left wrist. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

if I told them that, the crowd would break up and I would be called a liar. More importantly, I will probably not enjoy this carnival in my lifetime, with hundreds of thousands of comments and retweets. & nbsp; & nbsp;

& nbsp; does not have this shop after passing through the village. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

A new Weibo post was sent out with a shake of the hand. "goodbye, this world." & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

the rest is as expected, but full of surprises. Most of the celebrities I knew were involved, and my boyfriend sent me two private messages asking me where I was, "tell me now!" He said in the second private letter. I think, where have you been before? What kind of fruit do you have? is it disgusting? you're still grinning, and you're not a pussy. I cross-legged, drunk and dizzy, like a dream, the blink of an eye more than thousands of fans, including Weibo Queen Yao Cheng, Weibo Prince Cai Kangyong, and some shrimp soldiers and crabs will not add to the workbook. To achieve a realistic effect, I rummaged through boxes and cabinets to find the paint I used to study art. I painted the red one on my left wrist, photographed it, and sent it to Weibo, which is not like a cut wrist! & nbsp; & nbsp; this is your heyday carnival, I said to myself, have fun. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

next in the comments column, it was like a memorial service, and everyone was desperately digging for truth, goodness, and beauty from my old Weibo. "how can a beautiful girl just disappear!" "Good boy, I hope you're all right." Even a picture of an 85 °bun sent by me in a certain month of one year was used to praise my simple and simple virtue. And my boss, a rookie who would never use Weibo after signing up, also clumsily sent several messages in succession to recall my good news. "I am very serious and rigorous, optimistic and lovely, and all our colleagues love her." & nbsp; & nbsp;

& nbsp; just as I was moved to tears, the door was slammed. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp; 

I have no time for others. New news surfaced. My college roommate recalled how much I cared about my sisters when I was at school and brought boiling water for everyone one by one in the winter (although what I remember was that everyone took turns getting boiled water for everyone). One Weibo post is not enough, and she keeps a blog post about the past, and then posts the link to Weibo. My high school classmates and junior high school classmates are all alike. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

someone outside the door is saying, "No, yes, is it this one?" "This is the house." "No, when will her roommate arrive?" All I heard was my name. I see. It's the one who came to the rescue. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

touching, it seems that there are not only onlookers but people who care about my life and health. My eyes are red and I want to hug them one by one. I could no longer sit still, almost rolling and crawling towards the doorknob, but when I reached out my hand, I saw clearly that part of the "bloodstain" on my wrist had fallen off and was dazzling. & nbsp; & nbsp;

I began to remember that I didn't kill myself at all. I just drenched my hands with curry soup, which made me very uncomfortable. & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp; & nbsp;

Weibo comments are full of "did you save it?" "give me a message from the people at the scene." "I'm dying of anxiety" & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& outside the nbsp; door, there was the sound of powerful Tackle, followed by the shouting of "one, two, three, hey, ho". I already heard my sister crying. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& the nbsp; the door is shaking and maybe knocked open the next second. They will see me safe and sound, standing here with red paint on the table. & nbsp; & nbsp;

I think it's very scary. & nbsp; & nbsp;

Weibo continues to liven up, everyone is crazy, the whole world seems to have known me for a long time, know me for a moment, give me a list of strengths. I have become an invincible good man in the universe, and I have the unparalleled beauty that should only be found in heaven. & nbsp; & nbsp;

but the door will be knocked open the next second, and they will see me and see me standing here, shamefully safe and sound. The invincible good man in the universe is broken, and beauty is a joke. A liar is standing here. & nbsp;  & nbsp;  & nbsp;

& nbsp; calm down, I told myself, you must be calm at a time like this. & nbsp; & nbsp;

I leaned my head against the wall, and then I saw the fruit knife.